Saturday, April 27, 2013

Dependency







 I just recently took a fall and severely sprained my ankle and broke my lower fibula.  The experience has given me the opportunity to reflect on dependency.  I have never had to depend on using crutches, a walker or a wheelchair to get around.  I have certainly learned in a very short time how much I appreciate the human body and independence! I quickly realized I could not move as fast as I usually do nor could I carry my coffee cup to my desk by myself.  A major part of my independence has been curtailed!  The challenge to humble myself and ask for help has now become a daily need.

In my reflecting, I found myself thinking about young children and how they need to depend on others for the vast majority of their needs.  Certainly from the most basic - like food and shelter, but also just to be able to bathe, have clean clothes and to the simplest - like getting to a play date to enjoy friends. 

Trust!  That is what we need to have in order to depend on others and ask for help.  I was on a weekend retreat when I had my accident and fortunately I was with a very dear friend who jumped into action.  She got me ice, found a nurse who was also on the retreat to look at my injury, and she brought my dinner to the room and got me safely home the next day.  Family, friends and co-workers jumped into action by helping me get me to the doctor, cover work duties, and fix me meals and even shower!

Whether we are 58 or three-years-old we need people, valued people we can trust and count on. These people don't just magically appear when needed.  Relationships need time to develop, to be nurtured and strengthened.  Strengthened to the point to where, when in a situation like mine, even if we don't want to have to depend on them we know in our hearts we CAN!

Relationships begin from the time we are held in our parents’ arms.  They continue to grow as we take the risk to engage with others.  Preschool can be a first experience in learning how to develop these relationships.  Relationships, not just for the moment but perhaps for a lifetime.

I ask you to watch your child, see how much they have to trust and depend on others.  Then ask yourself who can you trust and depend on, who can trust and depend on you?